The Everton midfielder let the world into the harrowing upbringing which still haunts him today and he can encourage other victims to speak out too
It was a haunting watch yet utterly gripping at the same time. Dele Alli bore his soul to Gary Neville, revealing harrowing stories from his childhood which have left him scarred forever. Despite going on to become one of the best players in the world, a star for England and one of the top performers in the best Tottenham side in the modern era, the trauma of being sexually abused as a child never left him. And when he struggled for form and lost his place in the Spurs team, his past ate away at him in the form of alcohol abuse and sleeping pill addiction.
Dele's interview on with Neville was a rare occasion of an elite footballer opening up on his troubled past, admitting he had sought solace in substance abuse. Dele looked understandably shaken at certain moments in the interview, and Neville supported him throughout. But it also seemed to be a cathartic experience. As Dele explained everything he has been through in the last few years and the pain that has dogged him underneath the surface since he was a child, he was slowly lifting a weight off his shoulders.
And at the same time that he was opening up, he was encouraging others who have experienced trauma to seek help, to try and find a way out of the darkness.
“Trauma is trauma and your body registers it in the same way no matter what it is. We all think we are so unique that no one has the same problems as us but speak to a few people and you realise you have a lot more in common than you probably think,” Dele said.
Getty ImagesDevastating impact
The interview led to an outpouring of support from the football community and wider society towards Dele. And Anthony Kelly, from the National Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Children (NSPCC), believes Dele's interview will give hope to other victims of child sex abuse.
"When someone with a high profile role or someone in the public image shows that child sexual abuse can happen to anyone it hopefully encourage others to speak out and seek support," Kelly, NSPCC Direct Services Manager at the Hargreaves Centre in Liverpool, tells GOAL.
"We’ve seen a professional footballer speak out about experiencing sexual abuse, that lets others in a similar situation know that they’re not alone.
"Childhood abuse can have a devastating impact on those who experienced it and it can last long into adulthood. Some are worried that by speaking out they may get into trouble it might upset their families it might somehow be perceived as being to blame.
"But we’re always keen to remind people that’s never the case and we’ll always encourage people who experienced abuse no matter when it happened or who the perpetrator was to speak out and seek support."
AdvertisementThe OverlapMore than 100,000 calls
The figures on child abuse are truly horrifying. According to the NSPCC, more than 100,000 calls of child sexual abuse were made to police last year but Kelly stresses "the true scale of this devastating crime is much higher".
The one positive is that victims now feel more confident about speaking out and the authorities are taking on more cases. Society is also becoming more understanding of the issue.
"Over the last decade since the Jimmy Saville scandal came to light society’s attitudes towards sexual abuse and the willingness to report it and how police approach these investigations have significantly changed,” Kelly explains.
“The NSPCC has done some work on that, we’ve got some programmes through our NSPCC learning which deals and helps professionals understand the impact of sexual abuse on children and the impact of sexual exploitation as well.”
Childline, the NSPCC’s helpline for children who have been the victims of abuse, delivered 15,515 counselling sessions between 2021 and 2022 where children spoke about abuse. In 2,267 of those counselling sessions, children revealed abuse for the first time.
Getty Images'It's important athletes feel secure to speak out'
Given what we now know Dele had been through, it is remarkable that he went on to become one of the best footballers of his generation. Aspects of his upbringing were known, such as the fact he preferred to be known as Dele rather than by the surname of his biological parents, and that he was adopted.
The scale of his suffering as a child, however, was hidden, and it is no surprise that he hid it for so long. Elite football is an unforgiving world and until recently showing emotions could have been seen as a sign of weakness. But the fact that he has come forward and told his story is a sign of progress.
“The pressures that come with being an athlete or a high profile figure are undeniable but speaking out and seeking support for child sexual abuse is always the right thing to do. Our view is that no one should be left to suffer in silence,” Kelly adds.
“Top athletes may feel the need to present a certain image and it’s important that they feel secure enough in their working environment to speak out. The NSPCC works with sports clubs across all levels of the UK and it’s good to see Everton and the footballing community showing support for Dele Alli throughout this period.”
Everton have also backed the NSPCC’s ‘Safety in Sport’ campaign, which promotes safeguarding in children’s sport.
Getty Images'Incredibly brave to tell his story'
The Professional Footballers’ Association also provides support for current and retired footballers who are struggling with their mental health.
“It's incredibly brave of Dele to tell his story with such honesty,” the PFA said in a statement to GOAL. “The PFA provides a wide range of wellbeing services for members, including a 24/7 helpline for immediate support right through to funded counselling sessions and residential rehabilitation.
"A significant number of players access and benefit from these services. Every one of them will at some point have made the very personal decision to reach out and ask for help. As Dele says, that can be an extremely difficult and overwhelming process.
"That’s why it’s so important when people like Dele speak with such openness. We work very hard to make sure players are aware of the support that is there for them, but also to help remove the barriers that might stop people asking for help, whatever their issues may be."